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Because Australia


Colin
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5 hours ago, Stuart Galbraith said:

Then God help you sir. :D

Could be worse, they could be from the Forest of Dean I suppose. :)

😢 It only hurts where I exist.

However in keeping with my aforementioned eternally upbeat and happy-go-lucky persona, and in glass-half-full/glass-half-empty dichotomy falling firmly in the "this glass contains less broken glass than you might expect" camp: At least they weren't french.

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Damn Koala drivers.

d989361c-7d9e-414f-b1ca-409043c972fb_w94

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Koala causes peak hour chaos at Adelaide freeway

 

A curious koala has been rescued after causing peak hour chaos on an Adelaide freeway.

The furry local sparked a five-car pile-up while crossing the road at Crafers West, bringing this morning's peak-hour traffic to a stand-still.

Lucky for the koala, one motorist managed to scoop it up and take it to safety about 8am.

[...]

Nadia said she was able to catch the koala with the help of other drivers and put it in her boot until animal rescue teams arrived.

"I grabbed my jacket out of the back seat and I went to the koala on this side like a toreador would do to a bull," Nadia said.

But the cheeky koala decided its adventures weren't over as it took to the wheel.

"It was poking its nose through the headrest and I thought, okay that's too close for comfort - I'd better get out and you have the car," she said.

The koala stayed calm until animal rescuers arrived and returned it to the wild, although not before leaving its mark on Nadia's car - a deep scratch clawed into the dash.

No animals or people were injured in the crash.

https://www.9news.com.au/national/koala-causes-peak-hour-chaos-at-adelaide-freeway/633a286c-1a3a-4a31-b239-9be4320815c9

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On 6/9/2020 at 12:38 AM, Ivanhoe said:

Mortal Wombat;

 

https://www.theregister.com/2020/06/08/wombat_attack/

 

 

 

 

However, Ozzies being Ozzies,

 

 

We are all grateful that Australia is a separate continent.

It was one of the rare (thank goodness) wombat / dropbear hybrids.

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  • 3 weeks later...

https://www.escape.com.au/destinations/australia/hilarious-lies-aussies-tell-foreigners/image-gallery/4698fd724ca7d6dedc1bc8f507a390f9
 

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Our explanation for New Zealand

"I told someone that New Zealand is a penal colony for our top tier criminals." - Posted by Turdodine

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Truth be told, it's not always that nice, sometimes it addition to the spiders the place is on fire. It's the birds you see, they spread the fire to drive out prey ... or possibly just to have a nice cooked lunch, or maybe they just like to watch the world burn. I'm not really sure. The point is tourist brochures will always show things in the best possible light so take them with a grain of salt.

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54 minutes ago, Coldsteel said:

Truth be told, it's not always that nice, sometimes it addition to the spiders the place is on fire. It's the birds you see, they spread the fire to drive out prey ... or possibly just to have a nice cooked lunch, or maybe they just like to watch the world burn. I'm not really sure. The point is tourist brochures will always show things in the best possible light so take them with a grain of salt.

Y'all named one of your provincial capitals after Darwin, that pretty much says it all.

 

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...and on the face of it, the place is nice enough that you'd consider living there. But the cruelty is right in the open, once that you look closer. Macadamia trees right in a park next to the city hall. Macadamia nuts all over the ground, free to grab. Yay!

Yay! OMG! Macadamias everywhere!

 

 

 

And no tool to crack 'em. 😱

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This is why the country was punished with fire and flood, true and tested methods of cleansing

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The videos were leaked to Australian media by a former government staff member, who said he had become "immune" to the pictures because of the sheer volume he received.

As well as the videos - filmed two years ago - he said people had used the prayer room to have sex and even brought sex workers into parliament.

The whistleblower described a "culture of men thinking that they can do whatever they want", describing some of his colleagues as "morally... bankrupt".

 

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On 3/19/2021 at 9:16 PM, Ssnake said:

...and on the face of it, the place is nice enough that you'd consider living there. But the cruelty is right in the open, once that you look closer. Macadamia trees right in a park next to the city hall. Macadamia nuts all over the ground, free to grab. Yay!

Yay! OMG! Macadamias everywhere!

 

 

 

And no tool to crack 'em. 😱

You've just got to use your head.

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On 8/11/2016 at 4:06 AM, Panzermann said:

That is not abuse that is correct use of ehrm vitamins. Yes. Right. Vitamins they are! ;)

Vitamin T.

 

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Seriously, its way past time to nuke the place from orbit;

https://nypost.com/2021/03/23/spiders-making-mass-exodus-amid-massive-flooding-in-australia/
 

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It’s getting biblical down under.

Spiders are making a mass exodus amid widespread flooding in southeastern Australia.

Heavy rainfalls over the last week have forced thousands of people out of their homes in New South Wales, with hundreds more having to be rescued from rising waters, officials said Monday.

But people aren’t the only ones fleeing the floods – swarms of critters have also been trying to reach dry land, according to videos and photos posted on social media.

Melanie Williams, from the NSW town of Macksville, posted a clip on Facebook Saturday showing hundreds of arachnids crawling on her garage door.

 

 

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3 hours ago, Coldsteel said:

We tried that.

It didn't help.

 

My uncle (an Australian serving with the RAF, say (1954 to 1965) and my father in law (long  dead now) (what a piece of work he was!), who served in North Afrika, then to Italy through to Austria as part of the occupation forces, where he met my deceased mother in law ( there were not many suitable eligible Austrian young men ). Well both were at Maralinga.  My uncle didn't have to fly through the clouds collecting samples, thank goodness, so he made it to 83 years old before passing (but from cancer).

My wife has memories of when her father, (well nominally her father on the birth certificate, he wasn't her biological father. as her mother was impregnated by some English doctor who my wife later met), coming home from the tests and having to sleep on a camp stretcher in the corner of the kitchen with a line drawn so that no family members could approach too close.  Even the family dog was ostracised by the community as being possibly radioactive and people would cross the street when the dog was being walked...

Don't talk to me about atomic bomb tests in Australia.

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A sad day in Australia;

https://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/school-life/trinity-college-in-perth-bans-mullet-haircuts-labelling-them-unacceptable/news-story/3a2e3a07b085bd17c88c396cfd268922

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An elite private boys school in Western Australia has banned the mullet hairstyle after deeming the hairdo “not acceptable”.

Trinity College in Perth outlined their ban on the retro haircut in its recent newsletter.

“It is without reservation that the College sets clear requirements that ensure health and safety, as well as setting a high standard for personal presentation,” the newsletter states.

“The current trend of growing the hair at the back of the head and/or closely cropping the sides of the head to accentuate the ‘mullet’ style are untidy, non-conventional and not acceptable at Trinity College. As is the trend of long hair and fringes.

 

 

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“Students are not permitted to have mullets, rat tails, top knots, mohawks, extra-long fringes, or any other non-conventional style cuts,” the rules read.

If elite private boys schools aren't preparing their students for the Mad Max world to come, then they aren't really all that elite.

 

 

 

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When the balloon goes up, it will be too late for those who failed to prepare via bleached mullets and assless chaps.

 

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Cthulhu's vanguard, or Japanese attack again? And the American vaxx

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Australia: Geologist beaten up by 'angriest octopus' on beach

In a video that has gone viral, the octopus can be seen in shallow waters lashing out at geologist Lance Karlson.

The creature came after him again later and struck him on the arm, before whipping his neck and upper back.

The tentacles left stinging red welts on his skin, which Mr Karlson said only eased after he poured cola over them.

 

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